Monday, April 20, 2009

NATO is Stupid!

I just read THE dumbest news story I have ever read.  It has made me so mad I could... I'm gonna... I wanna... Blog!!! 

I was reading on CNN and it said that a pirate attack was thwarted off the coast of Somolia and I thought, "Hey, this would be a cool story!" so I read and, no lie, this is what it said:

"NATO forces patrolling the Gulf of Aden foiled a pirate attack on a Norwegian tanker this weekend, a NATO spokesman said.

Pirates attempted to capture the MV Front Ardennes at 6 p.m. Saturday and were apprehended seven hours later, Commander Chris Davies told CNN.

A NATO-supported Canadian navy ship, the HMCS Winnipeg, was returning from escorting a World Food Program vessel in the gulf when it saw the Norwegian ship under attack, Davies said. A British Royal Fleet Auxiliary vessel, the Wave Knight, was also in the area.

The pirates were captured at 1 a.m. Sunday after they threw weapons, ladders and scaling equipment overboard, Davies said. Several rounds of ammunition were found on the pirates' boat.

The pirates were detained, but allowed to go free after questioning.

There is currently no formal procedure for NATO personnel to follow once they have apprehended pirates, Davies noted. Their weapons are confiscated and they are then typically given provisions and released."

What!!???  You mean that the NATO forces saw pirates attacking a ship, spent seven hours overtaking and apprehending their ship, found weapons on their ship, detained them, questioned them, and then GAVE THEM FOOD and LET THEM GO!? What!? Does this make sense to anyone? I can think of sooooo many things wrong with it! What did the pirates say during the questioning?  We're they really convincing enough that the NATO forces felt they weren't a threat?  Did the pirates say "We weren't really trying to take the ship, per se, we just thought they were having a dance party and wanted to join really bad!" or "What? Taking other people's boats is wrong?  We had no idea?"  Seriously!  I know why piracy is still a problem in the east, it's because the people we have put in charge of combating it are complete idiots!

I think the cherry on the top of this whole article is that we even gave them food!  "Stop attacking us or... or... or we'll give you food!" 

Morons.  Thank you for reading my ranting.

Monday, April 13, 2009

We're back! and we have a challenge for our avid listeners (that's you)!

One of my very closest friends, Chris Beach, is getting married this summer and Christian and I have decided to attend because we love him.  The wedding is up in Washington (state) and because neither Christian nor I have been to Oregon or Washington, or even Northern California, we've decided to turn this into a road trip.  It will probably be replete with break downs and engine fires and hitchhiking and cow tipping, but we think we can do better than all those combined.  we want you, the reader, to make a list of things you want us to do, and we will see how many we can do and get pictures of.  For example, you may want us to get pictures with some hard-core motorcyclists sporting american flag head bands.  Or you may want us to swing on fifteen different swingsets. Or you may want us to ride a bull moose.  You make the list and we will print it out and do as many as we can and take pictures while we're doing it.  We plan on having a ton of fun and want some help from you.

We have been trying our best to survive this semester, and so far have done a pretty good job of it.  Christian was in Macbeth, I saw Macbeth.  Christian got his haircut pretty short, I approved of his haircut.  Christian did homework, I also did homework.  Eric came and surprised Christian, Eric left his watch with us.  Mom came and visited us, our cupboards are stuffed with food.  We have started hosting dessert nights at our apartment, no one in our apartment sleeps on Sunday nights.  Pirates took a US ship, they died.

Something very big that has happened in our life is that we are now members of a very exclusive club.  A club that is only for nobles and professionals. Sam's club.  Card-Carrying members.  We feel like real men.

If anyone's wondering about my dating life, it doesn't really exist.  I was taken on a fun quadruple date a couple of weeks ago.  And I actually asked a girl out on a date to a show... with my mother.  I love my mother, I really do, but for the sake of the girls I ask out, I really don't plan on bringing her along on future dates.  I felt like I was back in middle school, because not only was my mom along for the date, but then she dropped my date off at her apartment afterwards.  I am such a loser.  I hope I get my braces off before my next date and this blasted acne goes away.

Love y'all


Ratatat | Lex